Stephen Colbert said on Tuesday's Late Show that he had no words to describe what the U.S. government has been doing over the past 24 hours. "It's like describing a new color that you've never seen before, and this color is made of all the other colors dying," he said, "like if a rainbow got gangrene." Then he spent the next three minutes trying to explain what the Senate is doing with health care.
Republicans have tried to repeal ObamaCare three times so far this year, "but they finally figured out why they failed," Colbert said. "They failed because people knew what was in their bill — huge mistake. So today, they raised the bar on lowering the bar." Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell's big idea was to have the Senate vote to consider approving an unwritten health-care bill. "It's a black box we can't see inside — it's Schrödinger's health care, but the cat is probably dead because it doesn't have health insurance," Colbert said. "They now have 20 hours of debate to fine-tune the bill that they did not write for the past seven years. It should be fine — they already know the big stuff, like it will be printed on paper, and that's it."
Subscribe to The Week
Escape your echo chamber. Get the facts behind the news, plus analysis from multiple perspectives.
Sign up for The Week's Free Newsletters
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
Create an account with the same email registered to your subscription to unlock access.
-
'Make legal immigration a more plausible option'Instant Opinion Opinion, comment and editorials of the day
-
LA-to-Las Vegas high-speed rail line breaks groundSpeed Read The railway will be ready as soon as 2028
-
Israel's military intelligence chief resignsSpeed Read Maj. Gen. Aharon Haliva is the first leader to quit for failing to prevent the Hamas attack in October
-
OJ Simpson, star athlete tried for murder, dead at 76Speed Read The former football hero and murder suspect lost his battle with cancer
-
Momofuku's 'Chili Crunch' trademark uproarSpeed Read The company's attempt to own the sole rights has prompted backlash
-
Kevin Hart awarded Mark Twain PrizeSpeed Read He is the 25th recipient of the prestigious comedy prize
-
Is Downton Abbey set to return for a final film?Speed Read Imelda Staunton reveals that a third movie may be in the pipeline
-
'Oppenheimer' sweeps Oscars with 7 winsspeed read The film won best picture, best director (Christopher Nolan) and best actor (Cillian Murphy)
-
'Rust' armorer convicted of manslaughterspeed read The film's cinematographer Halyna Hutchins was shot and killed by actor Alec Baldwin during rehearsal
-
The Beatles are getting 4 intersecting biopicsSpeed Read Director Sam Mendes is making four separate movies, each told from the perspective of one band member
-
Taylor Swift to Miley Cyrus: female artists dominate 2024 GrammysSpeed Read SZA, Phoebe Bridgers and Lainey Wilson were also among the winners at LA gala
